are you so shy because you have an std?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Blood and glitter go together right?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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