He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
