I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
