There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
