Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize