Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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