I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
this boner is exhausting
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
