What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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