Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
he wants to bone in the snuggie
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
