why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
