how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Randomize
