i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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