Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
