Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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