Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
