I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
