I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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