i permit you to call me
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
