Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
