Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
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