He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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