I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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