covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
These tits shall not be calmed
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I'm bleeding and have questions
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
