I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
