he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
