arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
It's blow job season.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Randomize
