Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
