Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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