Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize
