I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize