I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Randomize
