I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Randomize
