But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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