Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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