remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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