I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
you never un-have a 4some
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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