another moral hangover. fuck.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Randomize
