i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
