I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I AM VODKA MAN
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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