And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
