And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
