I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
