Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
