what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
