That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
