I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
it's great music for shaving your balls
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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