I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I deserve this hangover.
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