Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I skipped work to stalk him.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
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