areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
