Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
